Proclivities... Oh, darn, it's big tough Tiffany and she's looking quite predatory today. Yikes! Daisy, why didn't you warn me? I'll have to get back to your later...
As I was saying three hours ago.... Proclivities, and by that I mean innate preferences, and by that I mean your inborn or ingrained item, that thing that is your thing. We are talking about what turns you on, whether or not you want to respond that way. For example, we often hear that a person is born gay, nothing can be done about it to change that proclivity. I submit that a person can also be made gay, particularly if they experienced "gay" sexual stimulations at a young age that were pleasurable. Of course that original act would not be gayness, but really be abuse. Either way, whether born with them or having them put there at an early age or even later age, proclivities live in the body and mind and emotions.
Sexual proclivities run the gambit in every category and no narrow definition makes any category more right than any other. The sexual rules we're in inherited about what is right and wrong come from the most repressed idiots of all time. It's all in the historical record.
I suggest just start with face value. You have a sexual preference and it just is. Relax and take the approach there is not much that can be done to change that. Behaviorally however, there are tons of things you can do and paths you can take, choices to make. I'll suggest: take the path that does not harm others at all and does as little harm as possible to yourself.
A fun place to play with proclivities is in fantasy. Do I really want a 2,000 pound woman to sit on me? Hell no, not in this gravitational field. I mean, I rather enjoy life and want to keep living it. But for some it is fun to daydream about. Well I guess that depends upon your proclivity, doesn't it? But I am talking to visitors to Amazons of Bluebelle Valley. And the idea of mating with a huge, beautiful, intelligent, super-healthy woman makes more sense than about anything I can think of. Maybe this should be the new standard, and anything less, well, "unacceptable". See how ridiculous are these hierarchies of sexual proclivities.
Here's the rub: society only condones a narrow band of proclivities. If you don't fit, then you can take your pervertedness and be damned. Really, it's like that. WTF, it really has happened -- a gay person being tied to the back of a truck and dragged to death, all because of proclivity and fear and intolerance thereof.
I am just saying to you what a lot of us have never heard enough from our families and from society. Accept yourself. You are what you are. And you feel the way you feel. And you get excited about what excites you. Behave yourself, of course, and by that I mean you don't get to hurt anyone else. But I mean, and no matter what it is, find a way to love yourself with all your preferences and even your flaws. Enjoy some fantasy if you want. Integrate yourself and make yourself whole. Practice kindness, compassion, and love in the real world for an additional feedback loop toward more and more happiness. And be most tolerant person yourself -- it does your heart good. With love, RB Greenfield
Out and about early on 9-11 fourteen years ago, enjoying the still of the country morning on the West Coast, I turned on the radio for company. The news about jets crashing into the World Trade Center buildings hit me as absolutely shocking. As I listened I felt that life might never again feel exactly the same. I turned around and headed home. I didn't want my loved ones to wake up to such news without me there.
I hate that feeling of having to tell a perfectly happy person disastrous news. Would they also feel the same -- that such an insult to humanity would change and cloud our lives? We shared the shock and sat down to watch the rest of the miserable drama unfold, the blazes, the people jumping to their death, and the unimaginable reality of the buildings completely collapsing...
In the coming weeks and months, indeed all through the rest of the fall, I had a rather open schedule. I'd been thinking about constructing, converting part of a large unfinished outbuilding into a guest room and office. So I rolled up my sleeves and got busy. I worked day after day, first leveling the floor with concrete, framing the interior ceiling and walls, doors, windows, putting in plumbing, electrical, lights, drywall, tape/plaster/texture, paint, flooring, and carpet. Construction is far from my profession, so it took me a while -- but I got it right. All the time I worked I listed to talk radio, news, analysis. NPR in particular proved helpful as they would reliably go much deeper than headlines. As I listened to the news, the commentators, the experts, the military, so many distressed callers, I slowly worked it out in my mind. Every day I "built-back-up", creating a new space, a beautiful space, a welcoming space -- and I healed. I healed through listening and working with my hands and heart to build a sanctuary in my corner of the world. The building looks big and rustic from the outside. But inside, what a nice surprise.
All these many years later the space is still beautiful with its pale-blue 'Moonlight Sonata' paint color. I built it such that the original old-growth redwood lumber in the structure could show through here and there in form. I insulated it to R90 in the ceiling; with planning, the room can literally be heated with a couple light bulbs. Now that sanctuary is a counseling office. Oh don't worry, it isn't me (heaven forbid) sitting with clients, giving advice. But the place heals. People go in and they start feeling better even before their session begins.
Well, it isn't much about Amazons on this first post. But remember, friend, I promised to be spiritually uplifting. I hope you have a beautiful, heart-felt day. RB Greenfield
Usually Daisy, pictured above, likes to sit on my lap while I dream up wisdoms for the masses. She just loves to play big bossy secretary. So please forgive me if I get off track with these blogs. Daisy can be very, very distracting. Oh about me, well I'm just a normal guy thinking about the world... RB Greenfield, Bluebelle Valley