As I was saying three hours ago.... Proclivities, and by that I mean innate preferences, and by that I mean your inborn or ingrained item, that thing that is your thing. We are talking about what turns you on, whether or not you want to respond that way. For example, we often hear that a person is born gay, nothing can be done about it to change that proclivity. I submit that a person can also be made gay, particularly if they experienced "gay" sexual stimulations at a young age that were pleasurable. Of course that original act would not be gayness, but really be abuse. Either way, whether born with them or having them put there at an early age or even later age, proclivities live in the body and mind and emotions.
Sexual proclivities run the gambit in every category and no narrow definition makes any category more right than any other. The sexual rules we're in inherited about what is right and wrong come from the most repressed idiots of all time. It's all in the historical record.
I suggest just start with face value. You have a sexual preference and it just is. Relax and take the approach there is not much that can be done to change that. Behaviorally however, there are tons of things you can do and paths you can take, choices to make. I'll suggest: take the path that does not harm others at all and does as little harm as possible to yourself.
A fun place to play with proclivities is in fantasy. Do I really want a 2,000 pound woman to sit on me? Hell no, not in this gravitational field. I mean, I rather enjoy life and want to keep living it. But for some it is fun to daydream about. Well I guess that depends upon your proclivity, doesn't it? But I am talking to visitors to Amazons of Bluebelle Valley. And the idea of mating with a huge, beautiful, intelligent, super-healthy woman makes more sense than about anything I can think of. Maybe this should be the new standard, and anything less, well, "unacceptable". See how ridiculous are these hierarchies of sexual proclivities.
Here's the rub: society only condones a narrow band of proclivities. If you don't fit, then you can take your pervertedness and be damned. Really, it's like that. WTF, it really has happened -- a gay person being tied to the back of a truck and dragged to death, all because of proclivity and fear and intolerance thereof.
I am just saying to you what a lot of us have never heard enough from our families and from society. Accept yourself. You are what you are. And you feel the way you feel. And you get excited about what excites you. Behave yourself, of course, and by that I mean you don't get to hurt anyone else. But I mean, and no matter what it is, find a way to love yourself with all your preferences and even your flaws. Enjoy some fantasy if you want. Integrate yourself and make yourself whole. Practice kindness, compassion, and love in the real world for an additional feedback loop toward more and more happiness. And be most tolerant person yourself -- it does your heart good. With love, RB Greenfield